[00:00:02] Speaker A: Welcome to the Emerging Minds podcast.
[00:00:07] Speaker B: Welcome Today I just wanted to start today's podcast by doing an acknowledgement of country on which we are recording today, which is the beautiful lands of the Larrakia people and pay my respects to their elders, past, present and all those young ones that are emerging. So thank you for tuning into Emerging Minds podcast. This is a combined podcast with Alison Elliott, a family therapist and mum of 12, Yvonne Clark, a psychologist and Lucas Williams, CEO of Kaurna Healing. So today's discussion is a practitioner's narrative about supporting social and emotional wellbeing. We'll be sharing reflections from Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander leaders, each offering their own perspective on what supports strong social and emotional wellbeing for children and families. Social Emotional wellbeing is an Aboriginal developed framework that, that describes the healing and protective factors that support strong social and emotional wellbeing for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples and communities. It helps practitioners stay connected to what matters most to parents and families. Let's begin by hearing from Yvonne as she shares what social and emotional wellbeing means to her.
[00:01:20] Speaker A: To me it's the name giving to a process to help families connect better to their, you know, their social aspects, which is family, community, et cetera, and to their own emotions, their feelings, their self worth, different aspects of their emotions. So it's a guiding framework as well, as well as a name and there's lots of these guiding frameworks around the place called social and emotional wellbeing. Wellbeing. The model that I work with is the one developed by Aboriginal people and for Aboriginal people which is about connections to different domains of social and emotional well being.
So these domains are things that are important to Aboriginal people such as, you know, our connections to community, our connections to our family and our, you know, larger kin group, extended family, our connections to country, our connections to our bodies, you know, our physical and our mental, our minds, connections to our spirit and ancestors. So, so it's about connections. The social emotional wellbeing model that Aboriginal people use. And that's the one I usually describe to parents. Cause I see many, I have seen many Aboriginal parents.
[00:02:30] Speaker B: Yvonne shares that social and emotional wellbeing for her begins with connection. Now let's hear from Lucas Williams as he shares what that looks like in lived practice.
[00:02:39] Speaker C: Way back when I started my journey, I was also dealing my children as you know, I've got six kids and I took one of my young people in, my nine year old son at the time and I just went and picked him up from a courthouse. He'd just Been in trouble and he was. We were threatened that he was going to be jailed. So I had to think quick about what social and emotional being was for me and for him, because we didn't know what it was. And one of the things I started to have to do is not only understand the words, I had to learn the practices of it. And so I'd go out on country and I'd paint him up with his ochre that he could wear and would do things on country that I knew made him strong.
And not only did it make him strong, it then made me strong. And then we'll come home and I'd teach him language and I'd teach him different types of things. I'd teach him how to look after himself, his spirit, for our proper way. So I had to learn what was important, not only the words of social emotional wellbeing, but what other practices. And those things for me was hunting, Taking him out on country to go hunting, taking him out on country to collect food, going out to perform ceremony in the way that we could with our babies at the time. There's different ceremonies, but you know, that's what I do. And today he's a 20 year old man and he travels the Northern Territory across all remote communities doing work exactly the same as me. So I know that those tools he took on board because I practice it. Sometimes we need to know what the practice is and not just the words, because words are just words. So one thing I really encourage you do is learn the practice of what social emotional wellbeing means for you and your family.
[00:04:03] Speaker B: Lucas speaks to us that wellbeing grows through everyday connection.
Now let's hear Alison speak about cultural identity and belonging.
[00:04:12] Speaker D: So with the cultural identity, for me it's the bigger thing that's holding the child. And if that's not there, like that sense of who you are in your spirit, like how you fit into the world, it's more than just your family.
It's like the much bigger container or cradle that's holding the child. So it's really important that that's built up. So if there's been big historical things happened, how do we reconnect that? Because that is a thread that's going to really hold when some of the family might not be well or things are going on. The bigger cultural identity is, it's okay, I've got this as well. And that could be your like connection to country and totems and everything, learning all of that and your responsibilities. Cause that comes into, as the child grows if they miss out on initiations, which is where you're stepping into who you are fully your role, then you have to create a contemporary way of still feeling responsible in the world.
So I think that that identity is crucial. I mean, the world's in a lot of trouble.
So, like, for little ones growing up, I get a lot of hope when I see so much work now in rebuilding our cultural identity, because it's like that's going to help us for future generations.
[00:05:30] Speaker B: When those connections feel strained, gentle support can make a difference.
Here's Yvonne on walking alongside families who may be feeling disconnected.
[00:05:40] Speaker A: There's lots of things that people can be connected or disconnected to. But if it was, they were talking about country, and just from telling me their story, I sort of thought they probably, you know, we could have a yarn about how they could connect to that, to countries. So that could be about their identities, you know, if they can sort of talk about the countries where their ancestors came from, you know, their language groups, whether or not, you know, they might tell me a story about, you know, they were taken away when they were younger and feel disconnected and, you know, it would depend on what their story is. So we would spend a lot of time yarning about a lot of that stuff and then sort of work out a plan of how they might then start to connect a bit more. You know, do they regularly visit family from their, you know, communities where they are, or do they visit other community members? Do they. Are they involved in lots of Aboriginal community stuff? Do they go physically to the place of their ancestors or do they find a special place where they feel connected to. It doesn't have to be their own country. It can be any country. Do they, you know, some people like to go to their country and, you know, take some stones or whatever they're allowed to take, or, you know, they might just feel a special affinity to something on the landscape and, you know, if it's okay to take, they can sort of take that and to have some connection. So there's lots of different ways. And I know some people who are incarcerated do some of those activities as well.
So it would depend on what's available in the parent's life, what they like to do, how the yarn would go. So there's no, you know, cookbook recipe to how somebody connects. It depends on their own story.
[00:07:23] Speaker B: Yvonne reminds us that connection looks different for every person and every family. Yvonne reminds us that trauma and disconnection can shape identity and belonging. Now let's hear Alison reflect on how trauma can affect parenting.
[00:07:36] Speaker D: For me, making sure that the parent feels that they're doing what they know. So it's like I was saying, if you didn't get something, you can't actually just magically know what that is. So if you didn't get enough touch as a little one, like as in held, rocked all of those early things with help with what we call regulation, which is basically, when the big storm comes, how do I make it a little bit less? And when the, you know, the sadness comes, how do I make a little bit less? So it's like that little one that's learning.
When I cry, somebody comes within 5, 5, 10 minutes max, and they pick me up and they start to feel into, what's that cry? Is it hunger? Is it nappy? Is it I'm cold, I'm hot, Any of those things. So it's regulating how loud I cry, how long I cry, that kind of thing. That's really early.
If you didn't get that, I'll always go, how do you do that? Then as a new parent, how do you suddenly magically know, oh, this is what I didn't get, and now I've got to learn how to get that.
[00:08:48] Speaker B: Alison reminds us that parents are often doing the best they can and that learning about trauma can open up new ways of understanding and care.
[00:08:56] Speaker D: There's a couple of ways it can go. Often you end up trying too hard, so you end up trying to really get it right all the time. And then there's this exhaustion because you're just wanting to do everything that you didn't get.
So that can often create a fatigue, which then it creates exactly what you didn't want. So we call it kind of like a overcompensating for what you didn't get.
And you can also go the other way and feel like you're never going to get it right. So there's a lot of internalized shame and that.
And so you end up doing the same thing as what mum or dad or your experience. So it can go both ways, knowing that you're doing the best you can at that time. But then that awareness, I guess, of learning, like being open to learning, because there's often a lot of pressure of, I don't know. So then I try and make it up. So having that education and actually knowing what it is and some of the, you know, like even knowing what trauma is and what it does in my body and what it does in my little one's body.
[00:10:02] Speaker B: Alison reminds us that trauma can shape parenting in different ways. Now let's hear Yvonne talk about the connection between culture, mental health and wellbeing.
[00:10:11] Speaker A: They are very interconnected, but at the same time also separate. I mean, I often separate mental health and there are clinical aspects of mental health which might get diagnosed or looked at separately from wellbeing, but you know that at the core of it, there could be wellbeing and connection stuff which has contributed to poor mental health. So, you know, they're connected, but they could be, depends who's talking to them. They could be seen as separate. Mental health is a lot more specific. Social, emotional wellbeing is broader.
So how would I describe it to parents?
Well, I'd just sit down, have a good yarn, yarn as practically as possible, give them lots of examples about social, emotional, wellbeing and connection and identity and yarn with them about, you know, how they might identify, how their kids might identify as aboriginal, what their connections are, whether they are linked to family and community, all those aspects. Before I'd even get to stuff around mental health, you know, if they're repeatedly telling me certain worrying things that the child doesn't, you know, doesn't know who they are or that parents don't know who they are and there's sort of lots of things happening and dynamics and issues within the family and you know, that the child isn't talking or is very closed off. There's lots of things you need to tease up in an assessment with family can be formal assessment or just a really good yarn exploring lots of things.
[00:11:39] Speaker B: Iman leaves us with a strong sense of hope, grounded in the resilience carried by children, families and communities.
[00:11:46] Speaker A: And there's always hope. Children are very resilient. They generally, they bounce back really easy. They've got, you know, if they've got a big family, they're nurtured in many ways and they laugh and they play and, and they do wonderful things together. There's always hope and also inviting creativity in kids and drawing and playing, all those lovely things. If we think about when we were kids that we used to do and how resilient we might have been back then, lots of kids still carry that resilience. So even though there's trauma that's passed down, there's also that resilience that's passed down from generation to generation and it's what keeps us surviving, but also in many cases, flourishing and thriving.
[00:12:32] Speaker B: Finally, let's hear Alison reflect on parenting and the care it takes to help children grow strong.
[00:12:38] Speaker D: There was some years ago called the mask of motherhood, where you just pretend it's all great and it's all easy and then suddenly you become that and then you're like, hang on, why did my sisters and friends not tell me this?
That it was really hard.
It is. It's probably the biggest job on the planet being a parent. And it's not valued in that way. Like there's a lot of value on other roles, but as far as parenting role, it's not being valued. I mean, probably in all our indigenous cultures definitely values on these different roles, but it's since it's got the. Since the woundings of the historical style.
I feel like that's when a lot of the value on, you know, really making sure that little child's growing up well and everyone's got a say in, you know, their wellbeing.
[00:13:30] Speaker B: Thank you for tuning in today.
As we close, remember that social and emotional wellbeing invites us to see the child not in isolation, but in connection, in connection to family, culture, country, community, body, mind and spirit.
As practitioners, our role is not to fix, but to listen, connect and walk alongside families, strengthening the relationships that support wellbeing.
[00:14:00] Speaker A: Visit our website
[email protected] au to access a range of resources to assist your practice.
Brought to you by the National Workforce Centre for Child Mental Health, le. Led by Emerging Minds, the Centre is funded by the Australian Government Department of Health, Disability and Ageing, under the National Support for Child and Youth Mental Health Program.
